‘Some lesbian you are!’ A guttural groan of frustration escaped me as online discourse regarding JoJo Siwa’s Celebrity Big Brother friendship with Chris Hughes raged.
Because that’s simply what it is — a friendship. Alas, it seems many people are incapable of realising this, creating an utterly miserable viewing experience for lesbians like me as a result.
Here’s the thing: one of the most wholesome aspects of Big Brother is how it brings people together who would never have met on the outside and strikes up unlikely connections.
JoJo and Chris are yet another beautiful example of that. In what world would the 21-year-old self-proclaimed CEO of gay pop ever have a chance to chat with the 32-year-old ‘Do you want me to rap, anyone, to lift the mood?’ Love Islander, other than within the walls of the CBB abode?
Since launch night, it’s been clear JoJo and Chris would get on, and it took mere days for them to form a very tactile, loving friendship.
From cuddling in bed and JoJo allowing Chris to stroke her back to sharing inside jokes, I’ve loved watching them grow close.
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But social media has run wild with theories about JoJo not being a ‘real’ lesbian and that she’s ‘so flirty’.
The suggestion is that she and Chris will become romantic soon enough, and the Karma hitmaker will ditch her partner, Kath Ebbs, upon realising she actually likes men.
As a lesbian myself, this is an exhausting conversation to continue having.
For as long as I can remember, my lesbianism has been scrutinised, debated, and invalidated, as if it’s a conspiracy theory to poke holes in and debunk. As if people are always waiting for that ‘gotcha!’ moment when they can finally declare me straight.
Of course, sexuality is a spectrum, and, for many, it’s fluid. Women can – and do – come out as lesbians before later realising they might be bisexual.
But when someone tells us how they identify, we must believe them. We can’t go digging for all the reasons why they might be something else.
While JoJo initially declined to label herself, she’s now a proud lesbian (stating in 2021, ‘That’s what I am’ and later saying men were ‘not’ her ‘thing’). Today, she serves as a pillar of strength for LGBTQ+ youth with her unashamedly queer music and online content.
In contrast, Chris is a straight man and is equally as comfortable in his sexuality to the point where he didn’t hesitate to provide a masterclass in allyship by defending JoJo against Mickey Rourke’s homophobic jibes.
Combine them in the CBB house, and not only do you have golden television, but an organic connection that’s been a breath of fresh air amidst the airtime of now-ejected Hollywood star.
Men and women can be platonic without wanting to rip one another’s clothes off. They can hug and sleep beside one another without considering there might be more to it, and I highly doubt either JoJo or Chris has given it a second thought.
But when I scroll through the CBBUK hashtag, I’m served a painful reminder of just how far we have to go until women-loving-women are free to be themselves without the shadow of heteronormativity hanging over them.
Danny Beard, a gay drag queen, has plenty of female connections in the house. He’s especially close with Donna Preston and Angellica Bell, yet not once have I read a tweet suggesting he might come out as straight when the show ends.
It’s only ever lesbians whose sexuality is treated like a puzzle to crack or a game to play until that desirable end goal of male attraction is reached.
From an early age, it’s drilled into us that we simply must be attracted to men.
Chris is well aware that JoJo is a lesbian, and how touchy-feely they are with one another is everything I wish to see on my screen. It’s evidence of JoJo being so confident in her sexuality that she’s open to accepting love in all its forms. Before coming out, this is something I struggled with.
I’m tired of viewers tarnishing the show by making me uncomfortable, pushing the insidious narrative that JoJo is only one male relationship away from being ‘turned’, and creating an echo chamber for Mickey’s vile comments about being able to change her.
And I wish I could say that at least by keeping the discussion online, we’re protecting JoJo from it in the house. Unfortunately, it seems to be seeping through the walls, as the TikToker has picked up on Ella Rae Wise’s apparent jealousy over her bond with Chris.
In the second round of nominations due to air tonight, JoJo mentioned Towie star Ella was trying to cause ‘drama’ by passing comment on her whispering with Chris at night.
‘And so that got me thinking; (she is) trying to spread drama in a way, and, I don’t know, I feel like it’s an interesting dynamic. I don’t like gossip,’ JoJo remarked.
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Viewers seem to be gagging for some kind of love triangle with the three, as if it’ll boil down to Chris choosing either JoJo or Ella. But if that’s the kind of storyline you’re after, you are going to be very disappointed.
And I’m sure JoJo and Chris would be horrified if they could read what’s been insinuated. They can’t, of course, because they’re off the grid for three weeks. But the lesbians in your life can.
JoJo won’t see your posts tearing her sexuality apart or your innuendos about her and Chris being anything more than friends.
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But people like me will, and you should know how much it hurts.
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